2 min read

Healing Is / Not...

Healing Is / Not...
Photo by Claudio Schwarz / Unsplash

Healing is not about having a "calm nervous system".

It's about having one that lives in the present.


It's not about the absence of pain.

It's about the ability to process and release pain.


Healing is not about "good vibes only".

It's about "All vibes welcome, mindfully."


And it is not about feeling good.

It's about feeling whole and wholly embodied.


We love to sensationalize.

We rob ourselves of gifts when we do this.

The deeper I dig into the grief of where I've been, the more love and appreciation I have for who I've become.

The deeper I feel into my body, the more at home I feel in my spirit.

Healing from trauma is the practice of finding the pieces of you that were left behind, bringing them home to the present, and giving them a second chance at living, loving, and being loved.

This includes the piece of you that felt angry but wasn't allowed to express it.

The piece of you that wasn't allowed to play, or rest.

The piece of you that wasn't allowed to leave, or say no.

The piece of you that wasn't allowed to make mistakes.

The piece of you that wasn't allowed to ask questions, or make decisions.

The piece of you whose joy was stolen.

Who else was left back there?

These pieces of you are still in your body, experiencing every current moment through the emotional lens of your past.

If you listen to the chatter about healing being sunshine & rainbows you'll never find these parts of yourself.

These parts of you are angry, justifiably so.

They're afraid, justifiably so.

They're protective, justifiably so.

The shame they're carrying for being these things is the injustice.

The shame is (usually) where you'll find the trauma.

And they'll continue to carry that shame until they're accepted, embraced, and integrated.

To heal them is to give them a place to safely express all that they've bottled.

Then, to love them the way they always deserved to be loved.

To heal is to take all of that compassion you've been told to give to everyone else, and finally direct it to these parts of yourself.

Tori