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Expressive Writing: A Journaling Method

Turning Painful Memories into Stories We Can Heal From

Hey!

If you're reading this it's because I gave you homework in session to do a very specific kind of journaling method. This method may help you process some old memories. Consider the memory you identified wanting to process, make sense of, or perhaps - put to rest - from session.

Hold onto that while you read this in full before starting.

This journaling protocol isn't mine. It was developed by Dr. James Pennebaker and has over 200 studies supporting its efficacy. It's also not about free-writing whatever comes to mind as we cathartically offload our feelings.

Instead, what you see below is a structured way to help you process and heal by giving this memory the time, care, and attention it needs to settle and integrate.

Overview

The commitment is to use the writing "protocol" below four times for 15–30 minutes each session. The sessions can be over four days, or (more popular) spread out over four weeks.

I always want to remind you to adjust as necessary to do what works for you. If it's too overwhelming to do 15 minutes I won't judge you for putting in 10 instead. It's okay for you to not judge yourself either if that 10 felt worthwhile for you.

Likewise, if you feel relieved after 2 sessions, it's okay to forego the other two. Use the protocol as guidelines. It was built from people just like you and me simply trying it out, and trusting what worked and didn't work for them. That's all this kind of science is. So, strive for the guidelines as our best bet, but trust your body to tell you what's true.

Also know that this commitment isn’t about writing perfectly. It’s about showing putting your truth to the page using the prompts. Unlike a research project, these sessions are for you. You’re not writing to share, impress, or analyze anyone - including yourself. I won't ask for them or see them, and you don't have to share anything with me or anyone else.

You’re writing to finally give your story a safe place to exist, undisputed and uninterrupted. That's all.

The Writing Process

During each session, find a chill spot where you won't be interrupted. Music or no music is okay, though I do recommend avoiding lyrics.

Set a timer for say, 30 minutes, and use the prompts below.

The Prompts: Choose ONE memory and answer the following questions on the pages:

  • What happened? Write the facts as you remember them.
  • What did you feel then? Name the feelings you had as you experienced the facts of the story.
  • What do you feel now as you revisit it? Name the feelings that are coming up for you now.
  • How does this memory connect to other parts of your life—past, present, or future?
  • What other thoughts, images, or associations come up as you write? Let it flow, even if it feels scattered or random.

Reminders to Help With Results:

  • Keep your hand or keyboard moving. If you feel stuck you can simply write, “I don’t know what to say,” until the words start flowing again.
  • Try not to stop to edit or censor yourself. Try to keep it as raw as possible.
  • Stay with this one memory for all four sessions. Repetition is what helps your brain process, form a cohesive story that aligns with and soothes your felt experience, and integrate.

Remember Space Out Your Sessions

When you're done with your first session schedule your next.

Remember the goal is to write about the memory four times. That could be once a day for four consecutive days. Or if that feels too intense, you can space the sessions out weekly.

Choose what feels manageable. You’re in charge of your process.

Aftercare

This process can feel heavy and you might have a "hangover" of sorts after processing. This is not a sign something is wrong. It’s proof you’re doing the work, kind of like a hard workout at the gym. Only this one was for your brain and nervous system.

After each session, take time to ground yourself. Drink water, stretch it out, shake it out, nature walks, connect with something comforting, or find one of your go-to strategies for self soothing.

Look around and remind yourself, you’re safe now.

I'm here for you in back pocket support if you need any extra help with this.

Optional: Reflect and Observe

If it feels helpful a week after your last session, you can revisit and re-read the entries to see the stories come together.

Wait at least a week, and then notice:

  • Do your words shift across the sessions? Is there more coherence, clarity, or calm in how you describe the memory?
  • What emotions stand out? Which ones feel resolved, and which ones still need attention?

This step is optional. You don’t need to revisit your writing if it feels too overwhelming.

Important Notes for Your Journey

  • It’s okay to pause. If this process feels too overwhelming at any point, stop. A large part of healing is learning to honor our nervous systems. It's okay to not put more on yours that what it has capacity for right now.
  • You’re not alone. If this stirs up something big, hit me up or someone else in your support system that feels right. If you don't want to talk to anyone you know, that's okay. Go to 7cups.com and sign up anonymously to speak to a verified listener for free.
  • This is one tool—not the whole toolbox. Journaling works alongside other methods, not in isolation. Use it as part of your larger toolbox.

Why This Could Work

When you write, you’re helping your brain make sense of the memory. You're "wrapping your head around it" by turning something overwhelming into something that feels manageable.

Your brain will instinctively work to find and create a narrative that lets your body and mind rest because it feels true, and whole, and complete. Furthermore, a part of the story will be that it ends, which might be a truth your nervous system really needs help embodying if this has been weighing on you.

Take your time and be gentle with yourself. This is courageous, vulnerable, heavy lifting kind of work.

Rooting for You Every Damn Day,


Tori